It can't rain all the time.

This has become my life mantra as of late.

I've yet to see the fruits of this, but I have to believe...for everything worth believing..that it really can't rain all the time.

I'm incredibly blessed with some really amazing people in my life, I know this. But, I've also come to realize that your friends can't fix you. They can be there...and mine have been amazing, no lie, but they can't do the work for me. For so many months I've kept all of this..crap...for lack of a better word closed behind a door. You can only pile so many things behind that door before it's precariously bulging at the hinges. My door is bulging. I have so much work ahead of me. I'm not at the point of opening the door yet. It's been flung open a few times in the past several weeks, but I'm always quick on my feet to make sure I muscle it shut again.

So, now I sit here realizing that even my bestest of friends can't fix this hurt for me. And, that eventually I'm going to have to take that door of the hinges and deal with what's in there. And, part of me..hopes it's soon....because sitting, alone, staring at a closed door is a very lonely place to be.

"Oh it won't rain all the time.
The sky won't fall forever.
And though the night seems long,
your tears won't fall, your tears won't fall, your tears won't fall
forever."

-Jane Sidberry, It Can't Rain All The Time-